Tudo estranho, inclusive eu. Sei la, acho que ja acordei meio de bode. Sonhei a noite toda com o meu ex-namorado, que ele estava com uma menina que eu detesto, e, pra piorar, na minha frente. Junta que eu tinha um monte de coisas pra fazer, pra ler, e, como sempre, fiquei horas me distraindo na internet e nao fiz o que precisava... acho que meu lado responsavel esta surgindo novamente, para o bem e para o mal, rsrs.

Pra ajudar, ontem eu e as meninas acabamos nao saindo, por pura preguica. E pelo frio, que ja esta de matar. Ou desanimar. Ainda bem que chego no Brasil bem na epoca do verao. Acho que sou movida a sol. Odeio o frio e dias nublados. So sao bons quando podemos ficar com nosso namorado, comendo bastante e assitindo o filme. Como nao tenho namorado, nao posso comer todas as tortas de limao que gostaria e eh raro o tempo que tenho pra jogar fora, tempo londrino nao rola!

Tambem estou num misto de felicidade e tristeza por partir, ansiosa, querendo que o tempo passe rapido e ao mesmo tempo devagar. Tudo junto.

Bom, a noite de hoje seguiu a tradicao, comigo e a Pati indo ao cinema. Assistimos a um filme legal The Prestige, mas um pouco perturbador pra um domingo a noite. E ai, claro, vi todas aquelas lojas de decoracoes com artigos de Halloween... sei la, deu uma vontade de ter minha casa (essa aqui eh temporaria, ne?), um marido... pelo menos um namorado, rsrs. Nao me entendam errado: nao quero casar pelo menos pelos proximos 4 anos. Mas as vezes da uma vontade... talvez porque o meu desejo nao leve em conta os aspectos ruins, so os baseados em cenas de filmes.

Bom, mas Halloween ta ai, e findi que vem serao varias festas pra eu mostrar minha sexy fantasia de infermeira. Haha, pois eh, aqui o povo nao se veste so com fantasias de terror nessa data, pelo contrario. Queira que minhas amigas e eu fossemos de meninas superpoderosas, mas so tinha fantasia de crianca. Optamos pelo lado sensual, porque eh o que todo mundo faz nesse dia.

Beijos e boa semana!

Yeah, a long time without posting anything. And yeah, today I will write in English. Probably because I am drunk and want to see how I do it. I will most likely read this tomorrow and be sorry for all the mistakes that I am making. Yes, I am also talking about my life, but mostly about grammar mistakes...

Almost hitting the point of 7 more weeks left here in US. Oh, well, I don't wanna think about it. It freaks me out. I Don't know, so many emotions put close together, that I can't just figure them out. Happiness, sadness, fear, excitement. Okay, great. Now I am writting in Italic and I tried to fix it, but I can't. Which fucking button did I hit?

I just had a bad day. Sometimes it suprises me to notice how people tend to think that I am always happy when I am really not. I get sad for so many things, so many unimportant shit. So much energy spent for nothing. Really. A lack of confidence, someone would say. And I would agree. It is just that I can't change it. Isn't it funny that we are so uninpotent that we can't change the very little things that we want to be different? It is so easy to change the world, to embrace revolutionary theories, but it is so difficult to work on our own personality. I wish I was tougher, meaner, that I didn't expect much of people like I do. I wish I was more crazy, that I didn't care about anyone and anything and I didn't get involved as I do. Most of all, that I didn't feel this intense need of feeling loved. But I am like that and it seems that I just can't chang it.

Live every moment like if it was the last one, laugh everyday, don't worry, be happy. Easy to say, isn't it? But it is hard to put in practice. I am having the best time of my life, but keep worrying about the same stupid things, missing the same things, waiting for someone that will never be mine (and keeps lying that he will).

Well, just confused about me, the world and the real intentions of people that surround me. Maybe I shouldn't even care about that. But I do. And I can't chang it.